(Okay last super personal post I promise, unless you guys don’t mind reading them? I do invite you to join me on this journey… I’m trying to improve, and would love for you to keep me accountable. If anything, I thank you for caring enough to read my story.)
Oh man. These past few weeks have been tough. Not that anything bad has happened to me, but I have noticed issues with my own attitude non-stop.
I’d get mad at things I never got mad at before and my anger would not easily subside. I’d curse, and it’s typically unlike me to ever swear. I would slander people as if I were somehow more righteous than them. I found myself becoming a jealous, selfish, unloving person.
Or perhaps, that’s been a part of me all along that is typically supressed. It’s scary to think that this type of person is hiding in me, but I think there exists an ugly side of every human – hence our sinful human nature.
My prayer for this year – righteousness and holiness – was a dangerous one indeed, and I think in principle it would be a brilliant prayer… if we weren’t living this side of the cross.
As with last year, He responded to my prayer right away. This time, I was put in situations to constantly test my righteousness and holiness, to see if I could somehow control or subdue my sinful nature alone.
It’s only been a few weeks and I have already had my answer loud and clear: I can’t.
But that’s the point. Read More