YouTube Fun: Sorting Out Some Archive Songs

This is uploaded on a separate channel to distinguish between my music and personal videos. Honestly this was filmed just for a bit of fun, but during the process of editing this video I found I really enjoyed it…

Until my laptop majorly crashed on Tuesday and I genuinely thought I bricked it. Sigh. It was probably a lot more stressful than I’d care to admit, but as such I am behind on writing my sermon reflections and posting this video.

I’d finished editing it by Monday afternoon but I wanted to show it to Jacky before I uploaded it. Who could have imagined that less than 12hrs later, my laptop would be re-installing itself from the Internet because that’s how badly I’d messed it up.

But, God is very gracious! As of this afternoon, it’s pretty much completely back to normal, with practically none of my files missing, and most of this video in-tact (at least what little I had to re-do was doable). The process even made me dig out a very old YouTube channel that I hadn’t touched in a long time, as well as reactivate my old UK number that had deactivated due to inactivity.

The reason I really needed to fix my laptop was because the internet stopped working on it entirely (though it was working fine on all other devices in our apt), and it had become sluggish to the extent I could barely load any apps on it. I was worried I’d somehow downloaded a virus or something.

Anyways, thankfully, we are now past that hurdle, and the video is finally up! Hope it brings you a little joy and entertainment today :)

YouTube Music: Before The Throne of God Above

I really got into recording more for YouTube. Realising that I somehow gained an audience of over 1.3k subscribers over the past decade while trying to figure out how I can do my part to share the gospel in this time of quarantine has led me to feel convicted to use it as a platform to do just that.

I don’t know if anything will come of it, or if it’ll even serve its intended purpose, but at the very least it gives Jacky and I more opportunities to worship together, while also giving me something to upload with a faith angle behind it.

I am rarely vocal about my faith online outside of my blog – shame on me – so, God willing, I think it’s time to change that.

Circumstances are really difficult right now for many people. I’m coming to realise that I’m one of the (fewer?) lucky ones who have really found rest, restoration, peace and joy during it. God has been very gracious to us in providing everything we need, and we are blessed that Jacky still has a job and income to support us both. I live in comfort and privilege and I am becoming ever more aware and grateful for it (though may I also be wary of the dangers of idolatry that come with it).

However, regardless of circumstance, it is always a good time to come before the throne of God above and worship Him, to bring our struggles, our desires, our darkness, sins and despair to the feet of Jesus — and remember just how good our God is.

No matter what, we who are trusting in Jesus have a great hope: that the sinless Great High Priest has indeed died for our sins and saved us from the wrath of God that was rightly due to us, and He is alive today! He is risen, death is defeated, and He lavishes grace upon grace over us by granting us eternal life and, one day, eternal glory with Him.

This life is not all that we have. In this life, may we be grow in spiritual maturity, ever more conformed to the image of Christ, to live out a life that glorifies Him. And through it all, may we not falter in our hope of eternity with Him, not forgetting that one day, we will stand before the throne of God in Heaven, in the New Jerusalem, where we will reign with Christ; there will be no more tears, no more sorrow, no more pain, no more death. No COVID-19s, no need for vaccinations… all things will be made new.

That is what we hope in, and Jesus’ death and resurrection proved His authority as God, His authority to bring all these things to pass, and that His promises will never fail. Our hope is in Jesus, not in this world. So let us not grow faint or weary, or fearful, but let us cast our anxieties onto Him who grants everlasting peace. And now, more than ever, may Philippians 1:21 ring true:

For to me to live is Christ, and to die is gain.

Philippians 1:21, ESV

Filming this song made me realise just hoooow out of tune I am when I try to play and sing at the same time. Sigh. I don’t like my singing voice in general, but this one really highlights how shrill my voice sounds. Nevertheless, I hope it can be of encouragement for others who also don’t have a perfect singing voice – worship is from the heart, to our Lord, and as long as that is fulfilled, He is pleased.

(I do feel sorry for the listeners though, sorry. I cannot promise I’ll succeed, but I will still strive to improve!)

YouTube Music: Tifa’s Theme Preview

It’s been forever since I posted a YouTube video, but since we’re all at home, it’s really given me time to work on things that I used to love but came to neglect in favour of school, Uni, work, life.

Square Enix released their remake of Final Fantasy VII and it just totally reminded me of my favourite song from there. 11 years since my last cover, I wanted to film an updated one – hopefully with a little more skill in me now so I can do the beauty of the melody some justice.

Before that, though, I need to re-learn and really practice this thing! The goal is to finally be able to play it without errors, but the chances of that happening very soon are slim to none… so a preview will have to do for now.

Edit: my friend, Daniel, created the professional title overlay and sent it to me! Some people are just super talented, right?

Sermon Reflections: Singleness of Purpose Part Two

Image credit:

Click here for part one.

Looks like part 2 took longer to churn out than expected! I do typically try to set aside time to review sermons and write my reflections on a Tuesday though so I suppose I am still sort-of on schedule.

4. How has it challenged my thinking?
I do actually recall being quite challenged by this the first time I heard it, especially given the changing names part.

At that time, Jacky and I were still discussing marriage and whether or not I was going to change my name after we were married. He wanted me to change my name, I did not want to. We eventually decided that I would change my name, but just not immediately after getting married. Regardless, I wouldn’t mind being referred to as Mrs. Chan.

This time, hearing it again so soon after doing my reflections on Christ’s Family First I was really struck by the significance of being adopted into the bloodline of Christ – especially as a woman – and just how dramatically that should change our mindset.

Jesus embodied it first – he declined going out to see his ‘blood relatives’ in order to be with his new spiritual family. Do I, now that I am married – do we, Jacky and I as a married couple – still put Christ’s family first? And are we honest to our single friends about the struggles of marriage and singleness? Have I also fallen into the trap of idolising marriage, or at least inadvertently suggested that it is a natural result for all quality Christians as long as you are not gay?

Post for another time, but I am convinced that you can be a devout, God-glorifying Christian while struggling with same-sex attraction by choosing to remain single – and I believe that while there are many who are heterosexual that continue to have the gift of singleness for the rest of their lives, God calls all His homosexual followers to a life of singleness of celibacy if they remain homosexual and still desire to follow Him.

So while I always strive to shower my homosexual friends with as much love and fellowship as possible to encourage them in singleness if they are believers, or share the love of Christ if they do not believe in Jesus, I am ashamed to admit that have definitely used language to suggest my beloved heterosexual brothers and sisters should be married.

p. Nick wrote:

“One thing you will not find anywhere in Scriptures as God’s will for his people; as a goal or purpose for which believers to strive, is for single people to get married.”

And I highlighted this in my previous post but I think it’s worth repeating:

“Can you imagine if our community were so focused on reaching the lost, discipling the saved, and living out the gospel that questions about whether someone should wait to date or get married were influenced by that urgency?”


“If we would do that, then we would have something meaningful and even attractive to offer those whom we would call to live their entire lives in chastity.”

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Beauty: Current Faves

Believe it or not, the above two photos were taken within minutes from one another and both in the same room, and neither were taken with the lights on. Ah, the magic of sitting by the window vs not haha.

Today was a day where I felt a rare burst of productivity and energy when I woke up and I liked the way my skin looked after having done my 5-step Korean skincare routine (okay so it’s more like 5-7 steps depending on when you do it) so I decided to put on some make-up. And take this opportunity to write about a few of my favourite products.

In these pictures I am wearing:

No Poreblem Primer (part of the Korean skincare routine)
Billion Dollar Brows Mad About Brows eyebrow liner*
Lord & Berry Line/Shade eyeliner in Dark Black*
Annayake 24hr Nude Moisturizing Veil in Clair (kinda like BB Cream – it’s very lightweight, comes out dark but then magically matches your skin tone once on)*
– Physicians Formula Bronze Booster (apparently discontinued – similar)*
– Shu Uemura Rouge Unlimited Supreme Matte lipstick in shade 342
– Mac Mineralize Blush in Warm Soul
Blinc Mascara
Items marked * were gifted to me back when I worked in the industry (yep, they’re old. I probably shouldn’t be using them but I like them and don’t want to waste them) and to be honest, I never knew the value of these until now. Oh my gosh some of them are PRICEY O_O

But we’re not here to talk about all of those. We are here to talk about these three beauties:

The last 3 on my list; I absolutely adore these and I’ll tell you why.

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