Hello, it is I, your Rory-al Highness. Last time I got sick from that awful freeze-dried food. Mum and dad are now certain it was due to that food because they stopped giving it to me and I stopped throwing up the next day. Good thing my humans have some degree of awareness. I swear, the things I have to deal with when it comes to them sometimes, sigh.
Anyways, you are reading this post now because my loyal peasants have finally provided me with more food to taste, so I am here with my royal review of the new flavours they’ve given me. I have it in good faith that they have purchased a total of eight different flavours of Tiki Cat for me to try, and I shall be giving my royal verdict on all of them.
I am not in the slightest bit excited, this is clearly as it should be. I deserve to be treated like royalty. Look how regal I am.
My servants have declared I must go back to calling them “mum” and “dad”. Sigh, they are so needy sometimes. I have to follow them everywhere to make sure they’re not distraught by the lack of my presence. Especially when they open the pantry door where all my food is kept, I definitely need to go in there to supervise and make sure they don’t end up giving me the wrong food – or, worse, no food at all. The horror.
Without further ado, here is my royal decree. We (the royal “we”, of course) are reviewing two more Tiki Cat tuna recipes today.
…I’m not excited, you’re excited. Did I tell you that I wasn’t excited? I’m definitely not excited.
Tiki Cat Hawaiian Grill Ahi Tuna – FINALLYYY my mum gave me some of this! I almost went insane waiting. She opened the can and ohmygosh it smell so good. It was taunting me. So near, yet so far… I stopped eating my freeze-dried food immediately and went over to mum who took her sweet time taking it out of the can.
I kept pawing at her and mewling at her but she just wouldn’t get the idea to hurry up. I think she must have made me wait an eternity. I am certain I have aged at least a hundred years. She says it was less than a minute but I’m sure she is lying. I am an old lady now.
The second she put it down in front of me I just gobbled it all up. I didn’t need to sniff it before diving in because, hello? I’ve been smelling it since it’s been sitting open on the kitchen counter and I’ve been waiting to eat it for the past millennium. See? Told you she took forever.
She only gave me half the can because we’re still “transitioning me” slowly. I am not impressed. I want to be transitioned quickly. I want to be transitioned yesterday. She says it’s for the sake of my stomach, so that I don’t get diarrhoea. My stomach needs to hurry up and get used to this new food right now because I am loving it.
Mum and dad were relieved that I got my appetite back and was back to my usual self. I don’t like my freeze-dried food much anymore. I mean, it gave me food poisoning. Would you eat it again after? I tolerate it now. But I love this. I wish they’d give me less of the freeze dried and more of this. I bet they’d be happy to do that too since wet food is a lot cheaper :p
Dad gave me the rest of the can the next day, yay! Mum is happy that none of these cans have upset my stomach and I’m loving all these new flavours. I suppose that means I should give them some extra love. Mum smothers me with kisses sometimes. I am a lot more accepting of it now that I am getting all these different yummy foods.
I can’t decide if I like this one more or the tuna and pumpkin more. I like them both! 9/10.
Tiki Cat Lanai Grill Tuna & Crab Surimi – I… did not like this one very much. It’s my first time ever trying crab and I was not a big fan. I finished all my freeze-dried food before dad gave me this one – or, hiding this one, more like. Mum and dad have been making me hunt for my food because the vet told them to. She called it “enrichment”. I call it annoying. Just give me my food!!
Okay I’m kidding. It’s kinda fun hunting for my food. My upright and quivering tail is too big of a giveaway for me to pretend I don’t enjoy it. But anyways, dad hid some plates of this and one plate of Kiwi food for me to find this morning. I found 3 plates of Tiki Cat immediately and finished up 2 of them.
I didn’t finish my 3rd plate of Tiki Cat though. I could smell the Kiwi plate so I ran over to clean that one right up before coming back, sniffing, then running off to hunt some more. After discovering, with much sadness, that there wasn’t a final extra plate of food, I begrudgingly finished the rest of my Tiki Cat.
Darn, I could have sworn he put down more than 4 plates for me to find! He usually gives me 5. I love the tuna taste, but crab? Not for me. I mean, I’ll eat it, I guess? But if I don’t even like it as much as my freeze-dried… it’s gonna be a 5.5/10 for me.
To make matters worse, mum opened a can of tuna today and didn’t give me any. She’s not a bad servant most of the time but I clearly haven’t trained her well enough.
They’re giving me one can of Tiki Cat per day now along with the Kiwi food. Doing the whole 50/50 split. I hope tomorrow’s can tastes better.